Proximity

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We live on the cusp.   Our street is right in the middle of two very different neighborhoods.  The wow, what a gorgeous home neighborhood.  And the holy shit did a hooker just walk by your front window neighborhood.  When we walk the dogs we tend to walk away from the later.

In the gorgeous home neighborhood there lives a cat who must be 249 in cat years.  He is always giving the dogs the evil eye as we walk by and I'm like dude, you are totally entitled to the evil eye, as I yank on Abner's leash.  He didn't get the memo that this wasn't a staring contest.

Anyway, I haven't seen the cat in a while and yesterday I found out why.  It died and is currently decaying on the side of the house by the road.

"Honey, have you seen the cat?"

"No, but I looked all over for him.  He must have run away."

Dude, he is right there!  He literally took five steps and was like that's it, I'm done, 249 is my limit! CAN'T YOU SMELL HIM?  Good god I'm blunt and morbid.  Must be all the sleep I'm getting.

OK, so where the hell am I going with this?  Why are you even still reading? 

Because Abner COULD SMELL IT!!!  Thank GOD I noticed said dead cat before he could figure out where the delicious odor was wafting from.  I guarantee if I wouldn't have noticed his ass would have been rolling in the rotting cat carcass in five seconds flat. Don't believe me?  He was rolling on the sidewalk!  He smelt the cat, dropped a shoulder and rolled on the sidewalk in ecstasy as though it were the real thing. 

Cute, but stupid

Kind of reminded me of the time that Abner rolled in a dead seal carcass at the beach.  Ryan had to drive home with the windows down not only because Abner smelt so bad, but because he was vomiting out the car window. 

"Officer, I promise I haven't been drinking, it's my dog, he smells like seal intestine."


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