"EVERYONE IS BARFING!"

I have mentioned my two dogs before, but I am not sure I have ever told you about my kitty. She is incredibly friendly, drools when you scratch her chin, chirps like a bird when she is happy, stands out in the rain and has the most beautiful green eyes you have ever seen. Her name is Gerogia and recently, she has become bulimic.


Maybe she has been reading too many fashion magazines or hanging out with really thin neighborhood cats that are wreaking havoc on her self-image. No matter the reason, I'm sick of cleaning up BARF!

It all started about two weeks ago when I woke up to a giant pile of vomit on the coffee table. I was like, COME ON PEACH! (we call her Peach more often than Georgia) UH! So annoyed. I grab a few paper towels and clean up the puke in a fancy rolling fashion I have perfected after years of cleaning up after numerous animal bodily functions. I figure it is an isolated incident and carry on with my morning coffee.

Unfortunately, it wasn't. Over the past two weeks Peach has puked on the carpet, the dining room table, the living room floor, the kitchen counter, the arm of a club chair, and finally, the sofa. What the hell! I'm over it!

Me: I'm not feeding the cat anymore!

Ryan: That is animal abuse.

Me: but she isn't even eating it, she is just throwing it up, she has probably thrown up 10 dollars worth of food!

Ryan: uhhhh

Me: Well, I'm going to start feeding her outside.

Ryan: uhhhh

Me: Fine, I'll feed the cat but I'm cutting her WAY back!

I have discovered after a bit of trial and error, that the precise amount of food Peach can intake in one meal is 14 nuggets of kibble. Starting yesterday, I feed her exactly 14 nuggets of kitty kibble at a time and guess what, no puke. Yes, I counted 14 nuggets and no, I do not have too much time on my hands, I have too much BARF on my couch!

Comments

  1. This is funny. I thought one of my parents dogs was bulimic as well since we poke fun and call him fat. We found out he has Acid Reflux.Why does the dog that eats the most have to have?! The barfing continues.

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