WHY!?

Okay, we all know Lilly is a pathetic excuse for a dog.  About the only dog like things she does is eat shit, steal food and roll in the grass.  Of course only the most pristine, manicured lawn will do, but I digress.  Really the only thing that one could say is gross is the shit eating.  And she doesn't discriminate.

 A few weeks ago Caches was romping around sans diaper (you can already imagine where this is going) when from the other room I hear, "Uh oh!"  Now, I don't immediately think anything is wrong considering uh oh is a new favorite saying, fit for everything from dropping a cracker to, this.

"What's uh oh, baby?"

"Uh oh, uh oh, uh oh, uh oh...."

"Okay, I hear you, I'm coming."

I round the corner to see a bent over Caches, pointing to a little turd on the floor.  I assure him that it's okay and we will clean it up.  Just then Lilly catches a whiff, perks up and pounces on the turd like it is her last meal.  "UH OH, MAMA!!!"  Yeah, THAT is uh oh!

Gross factor fifty, but in all honesty she has eaten WAY worse than baby poop so I wasn't completely dying inside.  Yet.  I go to the broom closet to grab the disinfecting spray and a paper towel.  (Yes, I used a paper towel.  I reserve them only for poop or vomit so it was okay) and before I get back to the scene I again hear, "uh oh."

Now what!?

Apparently he wasn't done and now there are three little turds scattered about the floor.  Lilly quickly snaps up two of them, ignoring my screams, and Abner has his unnaturally short bulldog nose pressed up against the other deciding if he wants to indulge.  NOW I'm dying inside.  I ban Lilly and Abner to the yard and move Caches away  from the "area" until I can disinfect!  With the mess cleaned up and the boy's bottom wiped, I decide to let shit breath dogs back inside.  I walk over to the door and I kid you not, the second the door clicks open, "Uh oh, mama!"

 Grreeaatt...now he  has peed and is splashing with his little fat foot all about.  Negative child.  We do not audition for River Dance with our pee pee.  Now, remind me, why do I let him play without a diaper again?

Comments

  1. Lol gross. My yorkie loves eating shit too...I'm so afraid for this stage.

    ReplyDelete

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