Voices from the toybox

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Anyone who has a young child know what I'm talking about.  You get the kid to bed, clean up the tornado of toys and settle down on the sofa to relax, when all of a sudden some demented blue eared dog cries, "Hug me."  You jump about 11 feet of the couch.   What the...

"I looove you."

"Tummy."

Fuck you creepy dog and your weird voice that sounds like a kid but I'm pretty sure is an adult.  Who the hell voices these toys anyway!?  And out come the batteries of yet another toy.

"Play with me!"

"Is it under the purple shoe?"

Okay, now there is an octopus giving me a guilt trip?!  I don't want to play with you octopus who only has 7 visible legs.  (The 8th is hiding around the back and took me months to locate.  And you KNOW I looked!)  You are bullshit and get balls stuck in your head all damn day.  I will not play with you, I don't even like you!  

This is why I like a nice wooden pull toy.  No wooden pull toy has ever tried to guilt me into a hug, a game or a peek under its purple shoe. 


Comments

  1. StephanieNovember 5, 2012 at 11:45 AM

    I have both of those toys...and yes, they scare the ever-living crap out of me at the most inopportune times. I second the pro-wooden-"nostalgic"-non-battery-operated toy movement! But good luck convincing the rest of the family and everyone on the birthday party invite list... *sigh*

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