Baby proofing fail

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We have off white kitchen cabinets that are covered in oatmeal, blueberry goo, yogurt and god knows what else finger prints, but one thing they are not, is baby proofed.  The cabinets have cute little knobs that he can easily open and the drawers have pulls that has not quite figured out, whew.  So the drawers are not a problem as of yet, but the cabinet doors, yeah, a problem. 

We don't keep anything "dangerous" in any of the cabinets, and he is rarely alone in the kitchen longer than a few seconds, but I don't really like bulk lentil beans spilled on the floor.  I was finding those little bee-bees hidden in various corners of the house for weeks. 

Yes, I KNOW what you are about to say.  Babies are fast!  ANYTHING can be dangerous to a baby! You are a horrible parent!  RUN to Babies R' Us and buy those baby proofing cabinet things that even a fucking rocket scientist can't get into!  WORK FOR YOUR FOOD, WOMAN!  

I don't want to!  I HATE them! 

About the worst thing he could do is chug Seventh Generation dish soap and if he wants to wash down his cracker with lavender soap who am I to stop him?  But that non-toxic shit is expensive so we did what any concerned parent would do.  We rubber banded the shit out of those knobs!  It took him approximately six seconds to start playing with them and now...



Anything is an instrument!

Get this kid an agent

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